FanPost

The sky is falling!/Rosterbation




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Hello, I'm ATLBFH (Atlanta Braves, Falcons, Hawks), I just recently joined talkingchop (I've been a lurker since the days of Gondee), I live in Augusta and have been a big braves fan since as long as i can remember (I'm 16, so i can remember back to the end of the glory days, the baby braves, the magical 2010 team *fuck brooks conrad*, and the shittastic reign of the Frediot). But that is enough about me, I just wanted to say high and that stuff.

Okay so let's talk baseball. We all know this season is properly fucked. No way around it. There is no leadership, no will to win, no just shear umphh that great teams have. In fact what we have are a bunch of players who seem indifferent, don't get me wrong I love me some Freddie and Jhey, but holy shit from the look of these dudes body language you'd think they were just sitting in a cubical. It seems the only player that gives a shit is CJ (who I'm not a fan of let me get that clear... hommie is almost as average as a player can get). Guys like TLS, Freddie, Jhey, Justin and Gattis have been "okay" this year, no one is having a breakout year (I do believe that Gattis was on his way to one before the injury. Meanwhile guys like BJ (who has improved, but still sucks), Simba (patience is key, I know I know), CJ (lord babip has been demoted to demi-god status) have basically been performing the same way everyday. (shitty)

So lets get dirty with a little rosterbation (just remember to clean off your keyboards)

*note I realize that our uber-conservative front office won't do this, but a man can dream

Dream Rotation:

James Shield (Like i said above, it won't happen, but I feel that he could be a key in developing Julio into that work-horse type pitcher.)

JULIO (man is gold 'nuff said)

Woody (my favorite pitcher personally, Wood has shown that when trusted and given a structured role he can excel)

David Hale (I wish we would stop dicking around with Minor and give Hale a chance, almost reminds me of Hanson vs Medlen... Anyway I feel like he could be a Khris Medlen/Aaron Harang love child in terms of results

Jason Hursh (Hommie is gonna be the real-deal I think anyway, to be honest I think that Julio, Woods, Hursh will be a 3-headed monster in the coming years)

- In this dream situation

Minor, Gattis, Northcraft, Salcedo, and Teroslavic are all piled and shipped to some team to replenish the farm

More Realistic Rotation:

Julio

Minor

Medlen/Beachey

Wood

Martin or Hursh

> We will probably sign some veteran FA, to bolster depth similar to the Floyd signing

I'm not gonna worry about the semantics of the pen but here is who I want in it

CK

Walden

Simmons

Vavaro

Shreve

Jaime

Graham

Medlen

Not gonna worry about the semantics of the bench either, here is who I want

Bonifacio (get him cheap)

Cunningham (give dude a chance)

G-Money

Johnny Gomes

Elmer Reyes

Delmon Young (not a braves-type personality, but being all pretty-boy has gotten us jack shit in the last 15 years)

Realistic Lineup:

Peraza 2B (omg I wish we would call this kid up already, he will be that true leadoff hitter)

JHEY CF (please for fuck's sake... let him stay in one spot in the order for a year, I know that he is versatile, but doesn't mean you have to move him ... in the 2 hole he can both create and drive in..)

Freddie 1B (dude usally rakes, but when he is in a slump... damn he is a black-hole in an already shitty offense)

Justin (he might well be traded this offseason, but in my head, he isn't and he continues to go mammo)

Pablo Sanadoval 3B (Frediot will sell his baseball card collection before this ever happens in real life... But ATLBFH, "We've been fucked over twice in giving older players big contracts" Well person who asked that, three's a charm and I think Sandoval won't decline as exponentiallyand I miss fat jaun and want to see some jiggle (it makes it more fun)

TLS LF (What?, I know right. Hear me out, TLS will probably be below average in left, but we need somewhere to put peraza... and I think TLS in left is more plausible than Peraza at 3rd, and I have him hitting 6th cause I get so fucking tired of players batting in the middle of the order just because they have power... Power ain't shit if you can't get on base)

Simba SS (please god let him level out his swing)

C-Beth C (aye his bat may be BJ-like, but that refreshing defense tho...

More Realistic Lineup:

Peraza 2nd

JHEY RF

Freddie 1B

Justin LF

CJ 3B

BJ CF

Simba SS

C-Beth C

2014 Barves final record.... 83-79 eliminated by the 2nd week of September

2015 Braves Dream: 103-59 WORLD SERIES BABY!!!!

2015 realistic: 94-68 loss in NLDS

OTHER MOVES:

Dream scenario: Fuck Fredi get hell outta atlanta..... WELCOME TP a manager who might give a shit

Realistic:

Wren... "Fredi Gonz is our guy. He has a proven track record at the major leagues and has be a great manager for out team. He has our full support and we think he will lead our team back to the playoffs."

Okay... Well I'm done

fuck the 2014 Barves

lets hope the 2015 Braves can turn shit around....

Go forth and rosterbate in peace...

-ATLBFH

p.s. if my grammar sucks, I don't care this is a baseball blog

This FanPost does not express the views or opinions of Battery Power.