FanPost

Fielding a Complete Team

If you've have the pleasure of following the Talking Chop Open Threads in recent weeks, you've witnessed the new favorite hobby of Smoltz's Beard and myself, among others: poorly photoshopping Braves players' heads on random objects.  This trend first arose in tribute to The-Ender-of-Worlds-That-Is-Troy-Glaus (patent pending), and has expanded to include such Braves stalwarts as Melky, Medlen, Kawakami, and this gorgeous creation that first appeared last night.  But then I thought, why stop there?  Why shouldn't I put Chipper's head on a javelina or make Lowe into Glenda the Good Witch of the North?

After the jump, a full roster of poorly photoshopped Braves players.


The 25 players represented here are what I guess I would consider the Braves' optimum 25-man roster, removing injuries.  That is to say, Diaz and Jurrjens are included, and Venters is in while Jo-Jo languishes somewhere else.  Some of these are better than others, but in any case I hope you enjoy viewing them as much as I enjoyed creating them.  You are also welcome to submit your own hack job photoshops in the comments.  Enjoy.


Tim Hudson

Tim gets in touch with his ancestors by donning the clothes of noted explorer Henry Hudson.  I believe Timmy pulls off the flea collar look flawlessly.

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Yunel Escobar

Yunel becomes my favorite character from the now-defunct series Nip/Tuck, Yunel Escobar Gallardo

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Omar Infante

Infante = infant.  Pretty clever, eh?

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Eric O'Flaherty

I love the Irish.

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Eric Hinske

Mr. Plow, that's his name.  That name again, is Mr. Plow.

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Brian McCann

When the Fraggles need advice or stellar production from the catcher position, they visit the wise Mac Heap.

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Jair Jurrjens

That quote about that Free Willy song was pretty good.

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Jesse Chavez

Jesse 'Cesar' Chavez is boycotting grapes.  I wish he would boycott giving up runs, but hey, at least he stands for something.

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Melky Cabrera

Here's hoping Melky keeps up his recent success and I create a prettier Melky Way image.

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Peter Moylan

I could definitely see Petey as a boxing kangaroo in a former life.

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Matt Diaz

CAPTAAAAAAAAAAAAIN CAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAVEMAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAN!

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Kris Medlen

Why it's our good friend, Crabs Medallion!

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Troy Glaus

Brad Pitt wishes he had Glaus's body.

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Tommy Hanson

Tommy takes a spin as Chris Hansen.  I think this would be particularly useful after one of Tommy's many strikeouts.

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David Ross

Rossie the Riveter!  *This image is to be kept away from Chip Caray, for fear of fisting implications.

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Nate McLouth

McClouth?  McLeod?  McLouth?  McCloud?  Yeah, that's it, Nate McCloud.

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Takashi Saito

Credit for this idea goes to a hooter's baby, who suggested last night that Takashi swing the bat like a Hattori Hanzo sword.

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Brooks Conrad

He may be a little small, but he can do great things (walk-off grand slam, anyone?)  Brooks is Mighty Mouse.

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Kenshin Kawakami

KK has a message for his teammates:

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Billy Wagner

Enter Sandman, indeed.

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Martin Prado

'Dean' Martin Prado and the rest of the gang.

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Jason Heyward

Truth, Justice, and the American way.

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Chipper Jones

Grandpa?  Old Man?  Affinity for Hooters waitresses?  Chipper Jones is Dick Vitale?

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Jonny Venters

Jonny is a Venters-loquist (but he's no dummy).

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Derek Lowe

Staples guy reads the stat line for a DLW.

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Bobby Cox

And lest we forget the faithful leader of this bunch of ragtag rogues.  Bobby is the Skipper.

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Have a good Memorial Day weekend everyone!  I'll be out of town, so hopefully we'll need some apprentice Rainbow Llamasaurus wranglers to celebrate a sweep of the Pirates.

This FanPost does not express the views or opinions of Talking Chop.

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