Jurrjens is Okay... Call off the Killer Whales
by gondeee on Feb 17, 2010 12:12 PM EST
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PrintPhoto from last spring training (hat tip Braves):
For extra fun, come up with your own caption for this photo. Here are a couple that I thought of:
"Uh, Jair, that's a Killer Whale."
"So yeah, Shamu is such a drag... he's right behind me isn't he?"
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okay
we get your point.
"It breaks your heart. It is designed to break your heart. The game begins in the spring, when everything else begins again, and it blossoms in the summer, filling the afternoons and evenings, and then as soon as the chill rains come, it stops and leaves you to face the fall alone." A. Bartlett Giamatti
uh, remember when I said "boo Jair" and everyone jumped on me
some fool even bought his claim that he hurt his shoulder when he “flipped” a ball to another player…?
Dude was playing a pickup game in Curacao no doubt showing off. I’ll say it again: boo Jair!
by nathan rothschild on Feb 18, 2010 9:08 AM EST up reply actions
“Scott Boras bought me this and said i could pay him back in 5 years”
"Matt Diaz is a baseball player."-Joe Simpson
pictured:
left-Jair Jurrjens
right-Bob Wickman, who’s loving retirement
Omar Minaya is my hero!
by Scott Coleman on Feb 17, 2010 12:36 PM EST via mobile reply actions
That Free Willy Song was good.
"SIGN PUJOLS OR FIRE WREN" ~ Swo12bv
by Smoltz's Beard on Feb 17, 2010 12:47 PM EST reply actions
haha outstanding.
"Sometimes I wonder what'd it be like to be outside and not hear the birds chirping...I think it'd be kind of nice."
by alligatorimpersonator on Feb 17, 2010 2:02 PM EST up reply actions
Game, set, match: beard.
"...Braves tie! ...Braves tie! ...Braves tie!"
by The Keith Lockhart Era on Feb 17, 2010 4:03 PM EST up reply actions
Damn
I was thinking the same thing. nicely done
"Batting second and playing shortstop-he's Cuban. Yeah, his name's Pablo...no, eh, Yunel Escobar, sorry"
Caption
The Braves’ RHP Jair Jurgens smiles as he thnks about his endorsement contract with Fruit of the Loom.
Caption...
Jair Jurrjens, Atlanta Braves starting pitcher, and Shamu, the creator of the “As Seen on TV, Sham-WOW”, pose for a picture. When asked about how he came up with the idea for the Sham-WOW, Shamu replied, “Naaaaaaaaaargh”. .
My opinion cant be wrong. It's my opinion. Those who don't like it can piss up a rope.
“Mom! He followed me home!!! Can we keep him!?!?!?!?!?”
Shouldn't Reid Gorecki get a shot in RF before that Heyward kid everybody talks about?
“I was traded to the Braves FOR THIS WHALE.”
-Yellow Jackets, Braves, Falcons, Hawks, and Thrashers fan!
+1
"Sometimes I wonder what'd it be like to be outside and not hear the birds chirping...I think it'd be kind of nice."
by alligatorimpersonator on Feb 17, 2010 2:03 PM EST up reply actions
nice
Plus, the whale is due $6M in 2010.
"Yeah, and I have an enchanted jock strap." -- Karl Karlson
by Jacob Peterson on Feb 17, 2010 3:03 PM EST up reply actions
And he'll be playing first base for the Mets.
"...Braves tie! ...Braves tie! ...Braves tie!"
by The Keith Lockhart Era on Feb 17, 2010 4:04 PM EST up reply actions
It took me a minute to quit laughing long enough to type this response.
Well done.
"...Braves tie! ...Braves tie! ...Braves tie!"
by The Keith Lockhart Era on Feb 17, 2010 4:33 PM EST up reply actions
Completely unrelated...
But why are so many people with blogs and podcasts still calling for a Damon signing and a trade of Diaz?!?!? It’s really getting my panties in a bunch… What will it take for people to see that Diaz>>>>>Fakemon!!!
HansonManCrush
by HansonManCrush on Feb 17, 2010 2:10 PM EST via mobile reply actions
Jurrjens:
So Carlos (Delgado), will this be your new front office job with the Mets after you retire?
Delgado:
Yeah, the Mets let me retire in style!
Another:
Jurrjens:
So Carlos (Delgado), will this be your new front office job with the Mets after you retire?
Delgado:
Yeah, my new job will be to pickup the pieces of the sinking Mets organization from the bottom of the Sea.
by dragonhawk26 on Feb 17, 2010 2:42 PM EST up reply actions
or better yet...
“Two Curacao natives reminisce on their MLB careers.”
(Pictured Left: Jair Jurrjens Right: Andruw Jones)
by Fischerking on Feb 17, 2010 2:44 PM EST up reply actions 2 recs
Dang,
you beat me to the Andruw joke. Good show.
"Yeah, and I have an enchanted jock strap." -- Karl Karlson
by Jacob Peterson on Feb 17, 2010 2:59 PM EST up reply actions
Awesome. Just awesome.
"...Braves tie! ...Braves tie! ...Braves tie!"
by The Keith Lockhart Era on Feb 17, 2010 4:05 PM EST up reply actions
Caption
Wait, wait, How do you pronounce your name again? Sha-mew?
I don't need the Cat Lady to throw cats at me to let me know she's crazy!
by McCann and McWill on Feb 17, 2010 2:44 PM EST reply actions
Jair: “In my country, we catch these with our bare hands.”
by WeStillHaveBobby on Feb 17, 2010 3:00 PM EST reply actions
The MRI results are in...
Jair Jurrjens congratulates Shamu on the results of its MRI, which showed only minor right flipper inflamation. Sea World fans breathed a big sigh of relief upon hearing the news.
"Yeah, and I have an enchanted jock strap." -- Karl Karlson
Jair Jurrjens pitched a perfect game today in beautiful weather and denim jeans. Jurrjens amassed 27Ks and 0BB against the underperforming Tampa Bay Whales (formerly Killer Whales, Killer was removed due to controversy). Unsurprisingly, the Whales struggled against the unfamiliar pitching and the lack of designated water of the national league. Jurrjens acknoledged the fact that he had a previous interactions with whales, but clarified that these interactions would not effect his game on the field. Jurrjens admitted, “When I was young, I would go out and ride whales across the oceans. They taught me about life and water.” Carl Whale, who led the league in stolen fish a year ago, was ejected in the fifth due to interference with a fan. The fan, a seal, told reporters that he remembered watching “those” National Geographic videos of killer whales and just snapped. Also in attendance was former Whale, Jose Whale, who was recently proven guilty of eating performance enhancing fish and is the first Whale to successfully write a book.
Pictured: Jurrjens and former Brave, Rafeal Whale.
"Hey Fat Kid...the monster is right behind you! RUNNNN!!" -The Host
by bwellnjonesco on Feb 17, 2010 3:20 PM EST reply actions 1 recs
i'll try
Jair:
Coach Weiss, I don’t play running back.
by apoxonbothyourhouses on Feb 17, 2010 3:54 PM EST reply actions
hahahaha
that’s the winner for me so far.
Omar Minaya is my hero!
by Scott Coleman on Feb 17, 2010 4:22 PM EST up reply actions
NICE!
The only problem is the whale doesn’t have enough spit hanging off its chin.
“Jair Jurrjens and Shamu here to warn you about the risk factors behind genital herpes, and this amazing new product.”
by Bronn on Feb 17, 2010 4:33 PM EST reply actions 1 recs
Jair demostrates why you shouldn’t give Pablo Sandoval too much water
"Batting second and playing shortstop-he's Cuban. Yeah, his name's Pablo...no, eh, Yunel Escobar, sorry"
wheres the sandoval cake .gif??
Pujols is NOT God.... sure he'll hit .350, hit 50 bombs, and drive in a 125....but then again...so will Heyward..
by lemke2blauser2bream on Feb 18, 2010 4:50 PM EST up reply actions
Jair: Why did the whale cross the road?
Whale: I dunno. Why?
Jair: To get to the other tide!
Whale: ….
"Now, here's a fellow attempting to ride a bicycle. But he's having some trouble, isn't he? And do you know why? "
~sighs~ "Why?"
"Because he's a Scot!"
by !Vive la Francoeur! on Feb 17, 2010 6:20 PM EST reply actions 1 recs
HAHAHA
The cheesiness of this had me laughing laughing hard. Now to explain what is so funny to the people around me at work.
Its even better if you are looking at the pic while thinking of the joke. JJ has this ear-to-ear grin and the whale has this total “stfu” face.
"Now, here's a fellow attempting to ride a bicycle. But he's having some trouble, isn't he? And do you know why? "
~sighs~ "Why?"
"Because he's a Scot!"
by !Vive la Francoeur! on Feb 18, 2010 6:20 PM EST up reply actions
Welcome to LA
Jair Jurrjens getting an autograph and picture with Hall of Famer Tom Lasorda?
lolz
Jair and [insert name of fat person instead of the whale] hangin’ out.
Here are Pujols's stats: 1.000/1.000/4.000/5.000. That's right. He is batting a thousand, with a thousand OBP (naturally), and every hit has been a home run, and thus his OPS is a perfect 5.000.
haha
"SIGN PUJOLS OR FIRE WREN" ~ Swo12bv
by Smoltz's Beard on Feb 18, 2010 9:08 AM EST up reply actions
shamu: if i played baseball i would have the coolest name in the majors….. what kinda crappy name is jurrjens anyway?
Pujols is NOT God.... sure he'll hit .350, hit 50 bombs, and drive in a 125....but then again...so will Heyward..
by lemke2blauser2bream on Feb 18, 2010 4:52 PM EST reply actions
Looking at the goofy grin on his face......
Jurrjens:
I know what you’re thinking ladies and you’re right……..mine is bigger. (Grin)
Jair, after the pic, talking to the camera man...
“That guy is tense. Tension is a killer. I used to be in a barbershop quartet in Skokie, Illinois. The baritone was this guy named Kip Diskin, big fat guy, I mean, like, orca fat. He was so stressed in the morning”
Excellent movie. Spacey’s best role.
"Now, here's a fellow attempting to ride a bicycle. But he's having some trouble, isn't he? And do you know why? "
~sighs~ "Why?"
"Because he's a Scot!"
by !Vive la Francoeur! on Feb 18, 2010 6:22 PM EST up reply actions
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