Now I did not create any of these nicknames, but since I am up, I will help you out with the one’s I can remember.

SK = Serial Killer is Kotsay because just look at his picture http://sports.yahoo.com/mlb/players/5846

FYF = Frenchy You Fuck because of his prolonged slump, after yesterday’s 3-hit, 4 RBI effort it was Frenchy You Freak, we will see what it is after tomorrow’s game

Vidro = double play because, well he grounds into a lot of double plays

Pujols = God (i.e. PUJOLS DAMN IT!! Or thank PUJOLS!!)

Tom Glavine = Abraham, because he is old

Resop = The Towel (because when we put him in we are throwing in the towel) or Reitsmop (because of how Chris Reitsma sucked)

JoJo = Some people call him Stay Puft (like the Marshmellow man from Ghostbusters)

McCann = BMac or Heap

Corky Miller = Corky the Cable Guy

Greg Norton = Rake (I can’t for the life of me remember why)

Mike Hampton = Mr. Glass (or enter any other derogatory comment about being injured here)

Chuck James = Chuck & Suck because “his name is Chuck and he sucks”

I’m sure there are others, but that should be a good introduction. Again, welcome!

Will Ohman – OFTLOC meaning “Oh for the love of Christ” not him

Campillo – The Rev

Bennett – 2008 Peter Moylan—shortened to ‘08 Moylan because he now serves as Moylan last year

Kelly Johnson – All Thumbs Jefferson, because have you ever seen him in the field?

Jair Jurjens – The Surgeon

From the Mets, Moises Alou – Pisshands, because he pisses on his hands to make them hard

Manny Acosta, is he Black Chris Reitsma?
Who is white Wilson Betemit?

I love it when nicknames like this are established. Pretty much all the vernacular that I use has been mentioned above. Don’t ever hesitate to ask who is who, we’re not that elitist around here.

Just be careful about making bold statements about people sucking or whatnot, because some people don’t like claims you can’t justify – old school mentality of just keen observation doesn’t weigh as much as cold hard stats to some here. This goes for Braves players as well as those who might be on other teams; there’s a blurry line that divides bar talk and those seeking real debates. Sure, we goof off during the game threads, but during slumps and post-bad losses, people get snippy.

“The path of the righteous man is beset on all sides by the inequities of the selfish and the tyranny of evil men. Blessed is he who, in the name of charity and good will, shepherds the weak through the valley of the darkness. For he is truly his brother’s keeper and the finder of lost children. And I will strike down upon thee with great vengeance and furious anger those who attempt to poison and destroy my brothers. And you will know I am PUJOLS when I lay my vengeance upon you.”

You guys missed one, I’m ashamed.

Tex = boomstick after the first 2 months of the year, fizzlestick for the rest.

Don’t get me wrong, I think the Cable Guy is a good nickname and I use it, but for some reason every time I see Corky Miller, my initial and involuntary reaction is to mutter “child molester” under my breath. I don’t know why, I’m sure he’s a nice guy.

After the Teixeira bobble head discussion, I now refer to him as “Bobble Butt” (but please keep posting the smoltzie pic, otherwise my eyes will burn). They were very confused at the Ted when I asked to trade the bobble head for a bobble butt.

Yes, I tell people I have Tourette syndrome. Well, that is if they haven’t already backed too far away.